Conversations with a sinner...

Sodium: dada

bipul is online.

bipul: haan dadaaa

ki haal hai

Sodium: mast

tum bolo

bipul: yupp..me tooo :D

Sodium: :)

kahan ho

bipul: office main..

Sodium: oh

workaholic dada?

bipul: kaal raat ko daru mara...pura din kaam kar nehi paay..aab kaam karna pad raha hai

:D

Sodium: :D

meri aaj daaru hai

bipul: alcoholic dada

good good

Sodium: hahaha :)

dada

CAT se 25 din pehle daaru pi raha hoon...paap to nahin chadhega?

bipul: aare nehui nehi....keep both the things in different vector space :D

Sodium: :D

u r a ray of hope in this sinful world :)

bipul: ha ha ha...

I always hope never expect :P

Sodium: :P

ray of expactation

bipul: yaa..thatz hope...like photons and light

Sodium: hmm

so this ray is composed of hope

and hope can be broken into further elementary particles...hard work, attitude, and passion

analogous to neutron, protons and electrons

bipul: ha ha ha...definitely :D

but expectation cant be broken into particles..since itself is a particle

Sodium: i m trying to find an analogy for them

for expectation

bipul: hmm

Sodium: coz expectation is hopeless

bipul: yaaa

it is...

expecattions never create hope...hope create expectation..as I guess

Sodium: but if according to rutherford...everything is made up of hope

then how can expectation exist

without hope

that means bu contradiction...expectation has some hope in it

by*

bipul: it does not exist..actaully its objective..not as subjective as hope

Sodium: ohh

so its like energy

it exists but is intangible

bipul: expection is much about realistic...hope is much about idealistic

again...expection is practical..hope is theory. And theory always build practical :P

Sodium: oye

practical builds theory

bipul: so...rather have the theory and then think of practical

in some cases..ptractical build theory...but in many cases..not

Sodium: ahh...

hence we can conclude...some hopes are made up of expectations ... and some expectations are made up of hope

bipul: galilio never saw earth rortate around the sun...but the theory proved it

i dnt knw that is galilio or some1 else

Sodium: yeah. so true

bipul: similar to hope and expectation

Sodium: how does it matter if it was gallilio or my grandpa

bipul: yuppp

never matters at all

Sodium: when hopes and expectations converge... it leads to eternal happiness

bipul: probabvly..

theory converges with practical...thatz the success

Sodium: rather it has the potential of leading to eternal happiness

bipul: yupp

thats why we do some lab experiemnts to prove theory in practical

when they match we get fulll marks in lab test :P

Sodium: thats just fooling ourselves dada....I paid my lab assistent 20 rupees to know which compound I had

so if u have 20 rupees...u can converge theory with practical

bipul: yess...so if u can lick the paper..u can converge ur hope and expectation off CAT :D

Sodium: hmmm

bipul: there must be some external force ..else 2nd law of thermoD will fail..

Sodium: my external force is the motivation I get when I see frnd requests from girls on the profiles of my frnds from IIM A

frnds who we unknown obscure faces at engg college

bipul: ha ha ha.....people get only one girl to settle down.....so it hardly matters if the girl wants IIMA or BSC grad....Its all about how u will be with the girl and she will be wid u :D

Sodium: ahh

kaash dada

bipul: kaash dada

Sodium: :)

bipul: BSC grads are also getting good girls in their life

and their lives are also happy

Sodium: they are getting even the girls of IIM A grads too finally when those grads are too busy to look at home

they shd be happier infact

bipul: yess..

we will never be happy...even u go to harvard

Sodium: That, dada, is my nemesis

bipul: itz just momentary that a girl wants a A grad

before and after that moment...things are different

Sodium: Thats her way of claiming a coveted degree

once her convocation is over...u r done with

bipul: and its just a moment....whole life will not be revolving wrnd that grad A

yess..

Sodium: yep

bipul: just a moment..

Sodium: u keep the degree in some cupboard

bipul: hmm...finlly its u who matters

Sodium: we complete a full circle here dada

u r a ray of hope in this sinful world :)

A paranoid's night-out...

Now what the hell...I live in a 10 x 10 feet room and that is enough to make things difficult for me. I have to think twice before adding anything new to my accessories. The room ends barely after it begins. As Circuit put it when shifting the luggage of Munnabhai in the medical college "Udee saala ! Bhai yeh room to shuru hote hi khatam ho gaya!"

And as if there was still a room for someone else too...here I have my new guest who perhaps hopes to put up with me in my small room. How many of you would like to welcome a new guest at 2 a.m. in the morning when you are just about to switch off the lights to go to bed!
I was just about to do that.

Life of bachelorhood is a period of trial if that after it is of serving a sentence. Both make you feel miserable.

Anyways...I have confined the new guest in the cupboard and it should not have a way out till morning when I open the cupboard. The only worry is what if it doesn't find enough oxygen for itself in the cupboard to last for the night. That would add further to my miseries. At the moment I can hear the sound of it cutting against the closed cupboard door. Or who knows if its the cover of my B.Tech. degree!

I don't know if I'll be able to catch a good night's sleep now. Plan to go to the market at 9'o clock to buy a mouse trap first thing in the morning. Perhaps it would be in by the time I return from office tomorrow evening.

And hey wait...whaaa...whoz this...awwww...Here is a lizard trying to climb onto my bed from my laptop woofers by my bed side !!!!! It sees plenty of food fluttering by the light of my laptop screen!

Any more guests in the queue tonight??!!! What the hell has happened! Is it some special night or was I just blissfully unaware of all the events going in my room from last one and a half year!

No !! You keep your mouth shut !

A heretic's confession...

What is CAT but a delusion of Indians with the perceived grandeur of their mental prowess!

What do the CAT 'bellers' gain but a few material assets, whose significance lies in their individual perceived notions of achievement, a delusive spiritual advantage over their brethrens, and a pretty bum for a girlfriend determined to be their wife! The last one is of course a gain whose danger doesn’t depend on individual perceived notions but is a fact as plain as the rising of sun in the east, democracy of the west and spitting of Indians on the roads!

Who does CAT appeal to but only masses that are an arrangement of bones and flesh driven by herd behavior and without something as a sense of want and want not!

Where does it lead them to but a land of fanatics for two years and forever!

What does it produce for an end product but the likes of the sub prime mortgage crisis!

Buddhha mil gaya...

“How long have you been doing it?” He asked me a week back on his first day.

“Four years now.” I said then.

“Have you done it in your young age uncle?” I asked him with appreciation today.

He had been coming to our gym from last one week and was more than 70 years old. Though he had a protruding belly now but for his age he had an amazing stamina. He did all sort of exercises. And that’s what told me he must have been a veteran in the field. Those old people who sometimes come to gym do the regular fitness exercises, not the butterfly for that middle and side cuts of chest, not the front and back pulley for wings, not abs in their 70’s.

“Young man, when I was your age I was an amateur boxer and a body builder.”

“Wow!” That’s exactly what I had hoped from him.

“So what have you done Uncle?”

My question was not that weird but he gave me a blank look for a moment. I couldn’t make it why. I don’t know what he thought of me.

“I am a civil engineer.”

“I retired as the chairman of CPWD. Many of the bridges that you see in India have been built under my supervision. I have been head of several committees to set syllabus of civil engineering courses in various universities. Till recently I was the project leader of Mayur Vihar extension of the DND flyway when I developed some health problems and had to quit active working. Now I am consultant to various government bodies.” He told me over the next few minutes in several breaks between our next exercises.

“My God.” “You are quite an achiever Uncle. Why do they keep you working even so many years after retirement.” I had stopped doing the Squats now.

“You know there is a dearth of experienced professionals in government projects.”

“Yeah.”

But something had started bugging me. This man is 70+ years old and is a civil engineer. How many universities in India gave a civil engineering degree back then.

“Where did you do your graduation from Uncle?”

The expressions on his face suddenly became nostalgic. You could see that sense of belonging of his to his alma mater when he thought of his moments of graduation after so long. Perhaps no body had asked him this question for a very long time. Perhaps a dust had accumulated over all those memories of his young years. Perhaps their place had been usurped by the realities of a practical world in all those years.

“I did it from the erstwhile University of Roorkee, now the Indian Institute of Technology, Roorkee. 1964 batch.” said the voice brimming with proud, respect and pleasure at the recollection of old memories. A smile on his face. Eyes looking into the past.

Time is an endless phenomenon I tell you. Years pass by. People come and go. Young become old. Generations change. But some things stay. Some things see everything else going by. Some things make lives.

40 batches had graduated since then. What I was thinking of was the 41st batch. He went on saying many other things.

The paths would not be the same. But I was staring at my future in a way.

Mera US...err Bharat Mahan !!!

We shout that rhetoric about 'Great India', 'India Shining', 'Mera Bharat Mahan', 'The great Indian Culture', 'The great Indian Legacy', 'Argumentative Indian' (and while saying so projecting Indians as having an inherently logical bent of mind and basing the reason of sustained democracy on this) , etc., yet most of us today want to emulate Americans. Why?

Perhaps rightly so. For the most prized virtues of humans. A free life, a liberal and tolerant society, for the largely unpretentious way of life of theirs, innovative and independent thinking and what not. You name an area of human behaviour where Indian are doing better than them today.

One problem, then, is with the rhetoric about priding ourselves on our false sense of greatness and morality. Patting ourselves on the age old legacy which can do nothing for us today. It's failing to even inspire us today. The problem is in deluding ourselves. And then, when I tried to brush this off by saying that the younger generation was being more practical about it, came the independence day and I was perplexed to see all those colorful handwritten slogans of Great India, Mera Bharat Mahan, and proud to be an Indian on big charts pasted everywhere in our office. And the people writing them were our young generation...the more practical one. I wondered if any of them ever gave it a serious thought that what exactly is it today that is an evidence of India being great? True I am born an Indian and I do love my country. But that for emotional reasons. My family is here. My sweetest childhood memories are associated with this land, with all those pit covered roads, and rural dust. I learned what life is in this country and from its point of view. My love is precisely because of this. But otherwise, for a moment, disregarding the emotional attachments and on any logical grounds, I flounder to find even a handful of good reasons for considering India a great country in today's perspective.

1. Look at our farmers committing suicides and what everyone is doing about it? What the ancient great India can do about it today?

Our governments are setting up panels to propose remedies only to be ill implemented either in the lack of funds or the lack of will or because of rampant corruption. And what are we doing? You and I? Cursing the government? Why don't we join some NGO and try to do something about it the way Arvind Kejriwal did for RTI ? He was just like you and I, an IIT engineer, not a tailor cut-out by birth for social causes and politics.

Then the noninclusive growth. What great is he who is content to see one of its hands starving and paralyzing while the other hand grows stronger. How powerful such an asymmetric person can be in crucial times is any body's guess. Those who have studied the growth of Japan, South Korea, Singapore and the likes would most obviously see the differences between their and India's path.

2. Look at the state of education in our country? and then look at the way we are trying to make it better...the reservations instead of emphasizing on primary education.

3. Look at the booming IT industry of India. Now that's one area which makes every Indian proud today..right? But not the people who reject anything based on mass opinion until it's logical to them. I'll tell u a model of mine to facilitate seeing the kind of work we are bringing from all over the world to our IT companies in proper perspective.

US is a rich household whose members work in big and quality firms and do quality work. When I say quality I mean some work which appeals to the unique human capability, it's brain. And when this household goes about its daily chores, it produces some waste, some garbage, some dirty dishes to be cleaned, some dirty floors. Here's where India comes in. We go knocking their door and offering to clean-up their mess, washing their dishes, sweeping their floors for much smaller amount than the person in their own area would ask for. What else would they have wanted ! They are in. When they earn 35000 a month and buy their child a laptop, an N73, a Skoda, we take home Rs. 1000 and buy our child a balloon, a Nokia1100, and a second hand Maruti 800. And despite this we happen to be better off than most of those living in our colony who are using their old bicycles and who were not fortunate enough to beg a work in the US households. That's the quality of work we do and that's the comparative amount we get paid for this. And then slowly when traders everywhere begin to see us being able to buy all those second hand Maruti 800s and Nokia 1100, they begin to see our rising prosperity (??), they hike the prices of everything for us too (read inflation and currency appreciation) and then we can not even buy a Maruti 800 because our wage remains the same (Why? If we ask for a higher wage they would be happy to kick us out altogether and bring someone by the name of Okawa Hounsos, an African, to do the same).

4. Look at the way our intellectuals are hostages to their language and everything associated with them. Of course I agree it's good to try to pick up everything good but then first for God sake we must accept our own weaknesses. We must drop this rhetoric about our sacred relationships when we know in the corners of our minds that a DPS MMS scandel is going on in every college and every senior school these days in all cities, big or small. The difference is just that these children are sensible enough not to send that MMS to their friends. I repeatedly write in my posts the use of English language between even the spouses in as private places as one's bedroom. Now this is something that need not be emulated. Whereas English is a great language, it by no means is a better way of attaining a better standard of living, or an even higher intellectual level or whatever such people might think it capable of doing for them than our Hindi is.

5. And then look at the extent to which we go copying them in their language. Our version of christ is our own God. Right? but look at so many of us saying 'For Christ sake' whenever we get chance. For God sake pal, you worship a God every morning. Use your mind a bit. Another one in this category is the word 'Christened'. In various news columns and from many people I hear the sentence like 'XYZ was christened as ABC'. Now what the mindless thing to say for us Indians that is. Their ceremony to name a child involves inducing it to Christianity from that day on. In our case a child belongs to its dad's religion from the day it is born. As with Western society, in India too the same applies to non living objects too. Whereas a Robotic Arm Software might have been christened as RoboArm by students at MIT, it would be named as RoboArm at IIT, how can you christen it if it belongs to the religion of the majority of Indians. But that would have been thought by us, had we applied our 'Argumentative Indian' philosophy to this sentence too. But who does. The Americans use it. I watched it in the latest hollywood blockbuster. It sounds urbane. Hats off to ya pal ! I bow to us INDIANS. India is great.

I am young...till today becomes yesterday

To wayward minds like mine...act before it's too late..

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be
it. The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by
scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable
than my own meandering
experience…I will dispense this advice now. Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; oh nevermind; you will not
understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded.
But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and
recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before
you and how fabulous you really looked….You’re not as fat as you
imagine. Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as
effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing
bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that
never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm
on some idle Tuesday. Do one thing everyday that scares you Sing Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts, don’t put up with
people who are reckless with yours. Floss Don’t waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes
you’re behind…the race is long, and in the end, it’s only with
yourself. Remember the compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you
succeed in doing this, tell me how. Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements. Stretch Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your
life…the most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they
wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year
olds I know still don’t. Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees, you’ll miss them when they’re gone. Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll have children,maybe
you won’t, maybe you’ll divorce at 40, maybe you’ll dance the funky
chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary…what ever you do, don’t
congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either – your
choices are half chance, so are everybody else’s. Enjoy your body,
use it every way you can…don’t be afraid of it, or what other people
think of it, it’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever
own.. Dance…even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room. Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them. Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly. Get to know your parents, you never know when they’ll be gone for
good. Be nice to your siblings; they are the best link to your past and the
people most likely to stick with you in the future. Understand that friends come and go,but for the precious few you
should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and
lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you
knew when you were young. Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live
in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft. Travel. Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will
philander, you too will get old, and when you do you’ll fantasize
that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were
noble and children respected their elders. Respect your elders. Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund,
maybe you have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one
might run out. Don’t mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will
look 85. Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who
supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of
fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the
ugly parts and recycling it for more than
it’s worth. But trust me on the sunscreen…

-- From Baz Luhrmann Lyrics - Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen)

Predicaments of a loser

'Sir tomorrow onwards I would give you a missed call 5 minutes before I am about to reach here. If you are coming then it's okay else you give me a missed call back' Said Guddu, the driver of my office cab as I got into the cab, late by 5 minutes. Mine was the first pick-up.
'Yeah. Sure' I said and grunted to myself. 'How would he know' I convinced myself.

'Arre yaar, your pick-up is before mine. Please give me a missed call when you are about to reach here'
'Yeah sure Anjali' Anything for you. I didn't say the second line as I watched her with admiration get into the cab. That she was expected to know this didn't occur to me mesmerized by her rare-engineer-beauty which had permanently reserved my dreams for itself.

'And yeah Sunita, give me a missed call when you go for lunch. I'll come with you' I overheard the receptionist with bob-cut hair say to her friend over the company phone as I passed the reception desk on my way to my shared cubicle meant for one, occupied by two. Cost cutting you see. Rupee is appreciating.

But the receptionist was supposed to know. It’s her job to speak. And by the way everything of her tells me that she is going to take part in next year's Ms. India contest. These are the basics.

'Hi dada' A chat window was flashing in the status bar of my desktop showing a message from my sweetheart of one year who was with me in my previous project. No ideas you dirty mind! I am still single and looking. His name is Ravi. Ravi Agarwal.
'Hi dada. Kaise ho' I replied.
'Wah dada. Late again'
'Yeah. So many mummies in our cab. Got delayed'
'Hehehe dada. When you are free, just missed call me. I have to discuss something with you'
'Yeah dada' Tum bhi !

'Hi Bhai. Why did you pick up the phone. I don't have balance. YOU are expected to call me. I was just giving you a missed call'
'Ao okay. You put it down. I would call you' I apologized to my sister as I looked at my phone in desperation. Yeh Bhi !

That's 'Missed Call'
a noun
a verb
and who on earth says it's an adjective phrase!

Loser!
I wrote under my name on a paper pinned to my cubicle wall.