They say the CAT is easier than the JEE...haaye iss jindagi ki jung mein..

Humein to CAT ne maara...JEE mein kahan dum tha..
Apni to kashti bhi wahan doobi...jahan paani kamm tha !!

India meri jaannnnn...!!!

Whenever I wonder about the rain drops on my hands and the helmet windshield on a bright sunny day on my way to office or back home...


... I look up gratefully at the sons of my land who then happen to be driving the lorry beside me !!!

Vrrrooooooommm....!!!

No matter how fast you drive...there would always be a faster biker around !

Readein...and if you like it comment writein :))

Sonia Gandhi would not be our prime minister because she is born in a foreign land. But she at least speaks fluent Italian. And how do we explain the sons of our own land who flounder in speaking 10 consecutive sentences in hindi !!

A classic from Rajiv Gandhi's speeches in the doordarshan era

"chahe hum jeete ya loosein..."

Guess what Advani and family would have made of this opportunity today :)))

Girte hain shahasawar hee maidan-e-jung mein
Woh tifra kya gire jo ghutnon ke bal chale
..
..
..
(only those astride a horse, and not the crawlers, can fall).

Never say die...

Its so strange. There are things that we had always known but didn't care for until a moment came when we realized the importance of those things.

From a long time, I have wondered why everything is more competitive now. What was it that kept us from all this development for so long. Why the academics now becomes almost twice tougher in about a decade. And how children can always cope with their level of academics with the same general performance levels as shown by their counterparts a decade back. Why the percentage of failures in a grade doesn't increase with increase in the level of academics for a grade. Why its much more tough to get into a good university today than it was a generation ago and how still the highest score remains the same as was always.

And when I pondered over this, I realized that the true potential of a human is far more than has been realized even today. And thats precisely why the limits of our minds and capabilities are far from being achieved in a long long time to come. And thats where the base of that old adage lies: Stretch yourself, your mind, your abilities...the more you stretch yourself the better you get. And there is no need to worry about the harmful consequences of stretching ourselves for a long time yet because the limits are still invisible.

In this process of continuous learning when we stretch our horizons, we continually come across new things...things hitherto not thought, not realized. And then our life gets suddenly better and then we wonder why we did not realize this earlier ! We could have done much better.

In one such event, I realized something recently that I had been overlooking for years. People had time and again told me I should smile more often. I looked hot headed. Always thinking something. Always lost. Mostly tense. And I sometimes tried to get over it. But always failed, for people kept saying this to me. And then I brushed the entire issue aside concluding I was of my type. Perhaps it was my facial arrangement that gave me this look. Of course I knew I was mostly lost, tense and thinking of something but all my attempts to bring a perennial smile to my face failed. And I accepted my defeat.

I got over it. I learned to live with it. But then something happened. My moment came when I realized the toll it was taking on many things associated with me. And this time the realization was through another channel. Nothing about tense looks and all. But my studies were severely getting affected because I was under pressure. Peer pressure, pressure from the knowledge of my standing in the competition, and pressure from the expectations from the self. I was breaking and was getting into a doom very fast. I was seeing the way I was letting a chance go out of my grip. And I struggled for days and weeks and months. The time was really trying and even this continual introspection was dampening my spirits even more. And then the prized moment came. I pledged I would never let frown cross my face now. And the miracle happened. You know what I found out. The natural intersection of frown on your face and the smile on it is a null set. Of course you can force such a expression but I said natural intersection. And in my case natural was frown. So here I was now...determined not particularly to smile but never to let frown cross my face. And guess what...I discovered that not only the intersection of frown and smile is a null set but these two form a mutually exclusive and exhaustive set. So there you guessed. If not frown, the face carries a tinge of a smile most of the time. I discovered this to be true of human beings in general. And since that day the natural looks of almost everybody I met reinforced my belief in this. The determination of not letting a frown come to my face made me ever more happy, socially charming, cool headed and had a profound influence on my concentration on things I deemed important.

And all that amazement of mine regarding the way of general human development since my childhood came back to me. I thought once again why I hadn't thought of this before. Why I hadn't realized this before. Life could have been so much more beautiful !!!

Perhaps its simply that events take their own course in time. And sometimes we just have to live our role in this grand drama called LIFE.

Gems...

Bullshit can get you to the top, but it won't keep you there...

Not everybody who drops shit on you is your enemy...

And when you are in deep shit, keep your mouth shut.

And you are there !!.

A LOGICAL SOLUTION.

Now here is a problem that finally has a formula for getting to the bottom of an age old problem. From a strictly mathematical viewpoint it goes like this:

What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life? Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

If:

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K 8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

and K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E 11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But, A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E 1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

And, B-U-L-L-S-*-*-T 2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

AND, look how far a** kissing will take you.

A-*-*-K-I-S-S-I-N-G 1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that While Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it's the Bulls**t and A** Kissing that will put you over the top.

The Making of Destiny

Some people are born mediocre..

Some people achieve mediocrity..

..and some have mediocrity thrust upon them !

You are in love

You know you're in love when you don't wanna go to sleep at night because your life is better than a dream.

9 Things I Hate About Everyone

1. People who point at their wrist asking for the time... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

2. People who are willing to get off their a** to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.

3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn Right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?

5. When people say while watching a film, "did ya see that?" No Loser, I paid Rs. 250 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor!

6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?"... Didn't give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

7. When something is 'new and improved'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.

8. When people say "life is short". What the hell??? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!!! What can you do thats longer?

9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?" If the bus came, would I be standing here???

So...is the hell exothermic or endothermic ?? What say !!

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington engineering mid-term. The answer was so "profound" that the Professor shared it with colleagues, and the sharing obviously hasn't ceased...

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or Endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote Proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law, (gas cools off when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

"First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let us look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.

Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa Banyan during my Freshman year, "...that it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you.", and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then, #2 cannot be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and will not freeze."

This student received the only A.

Wow...what say...shall I tell her !!

This one wraps the story of so many hearts in a few lines...Never wait till its too late

10th grade

As I sat there in English class, I stared at the girl next to me. She was my so called "best friend". I stared at her long, silky hair, and wished she was mine. But she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. After class, she walked up to me and asked me for the notes she had missed the day before and handed them to her. She said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I wanted to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

11th grade

The phone rang. On the other end, it was her. She was in tears, mumbling on and on about how her love had broke her heart. She asked me to come over because she didn't want to be alone, so I did. As I sat next to her on the sofa, I stared at her soft eyes, wishing she was mine. After 2 hours, one Drew Barrymore movie, and three bags of chips, she decided to go to sleep. She looked at me, said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Senior year

The day before prom she walked to my locker. My date is sick" she said; he's not going to go well, I didn't have a date, and in 7th grade, we made a promise that if neither of us had dates, we would go together just as "best friends". So we did. Prom night, after everything was over, I was standing at her front door step. I stared at her as she smiled at me and stared at me with her crystal eyes. I want her to be mine, but she isn't think of me like that, and I know it. Then she said "I had the best time, thanks!" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Graduation Day

A day passed, then a week, then a month. Before I could blink, it was graduation day. I watched as her perfect body floated like an angel up on stage to get her diploma. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. Before everyone went home, she came to me in her smock and hat, and cried as I hugged her. Then she lifted her head from my shoulder and said, "you're my best friend, thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

A Few Years Later

Now I sit in the pews of the church. That girl is getting married now. I watched her say "I do" and drive off to her new life, married to another man. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn't see me like that, and I knew it. But before she drove away, she came to me and said "you came!". She said "thanks" and kissed me on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Funeral

Years passed, I looked down at the coffin of a girl who used to be my "best friend". At the service, they read a diary entry she had written in her high school years. This is what it read: I stare at him wishing he was mine, but he doesn't notice me like that, and I know it. I want to tell him, I want him to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love him but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why. I wish he would tell me he loved me! `I wish I did too...` I thought to my self, and I cried.

...and were you afraid you'd die the same as you came here

No one dies a virgin...
...Life screws us all

hey there...yeah thats what I am talking about...your million doller smile :)

I get the best feeling in the world when you say hi or even smile at me because I know, even if its just for a second, that I've crossed your mind.

I Get Wings to Fly, I'm Alive (Celine Dion)

Mmmmm ... Mmmmm ...
I get wings to fly
Oh, oh ... I'm alive ... Yeah

When you call on me
When I hear you breathe
I get wings to fly
I feel that I'm alive

When you look at me
I can touch the sky
I know that I'm alive

When you bless the day
I just drift away
All my worries die
I'm glad that I'm alive

You've set my heart on fire
Filled me with love
Made me a woman on clouds above

I couldn't get much higher
My spirit takes flight
'Cause I am alive

When you call on me
(When you call on me)
When I hear you breathe
(When I hear you breathe)
I get wings to fly
I feel that I'm alive
(I am alive)

When you reach for me
(When you reach for me)
Raising spirits high
God knows that...

That I'll be the one
Standing by through good and through trying times
And it's only begun
I can't wait for the rest of my life

When you call on me
(When you call on me)
When you reach for me
(When you reach for me)
I get wings to fly
I feel that...

When you bless the day
(When you bless, you bless the day)
I just drift away
(I just drift away)
All my worries die
I know that I'm alive

I get wings to fly
God knows that I'm alive